Our Arizona adventures!

This weekend we went to Auntie Nikki's house! It was so much fun! The kids loved being there with all their cousins. We left early Saturday morning and got there in the afternoon. The whole trip Grant would say, where are we going? We'd tell him we were going no to see Auntie Nikki. Eventually when he'd ask, I started saying, "where are we going Grant?" And he'd say, excitedly, "to Auntie Nikki's house?!" He was so excited to see them! When we got there, he wanted nothing to do with us! It was so fun to see him play so hard with his cousins. They would get to laughing so hard and that is the best sound ever! Rayann loved little Chili Dog! She squealed constantly when she came near! It was so sweet! She had fun with her most nurturing cousin Karli! Karli LOVED showing her off to all her neighborhood friends! 

Later that evening NiKole and I went to Macayos. Arizona Macayos is NOTHING like Vegas Macayos. At all. I don't even know why they have the same name! Haha! But luckily we got this waiter who knew all about the menu in Vegas. He helped us order what we like and NiKole found that she liked the way they prepared her dinner better than Vegas! We had such a good time talking and catching up on everything you could think of. Then we got back home and the boys (Todd and Joe) had made us dutch oven peach cobbler. We were STUFFED! We stayed up all night talking and catching up. Such therapeutic times. The next day was Sunday. I woke up pretty sick. I couldn't stop sneezing and my body ached and sinuses were hurting. So we decided to stay home from church and rest while NiKole and her family went. When they got home Todd made us some heart shaped pink pancakes! Well, Todd and the kids! They got to "misk" (mix) it, as Grant says! They were pretty tasty! 

(Can you tell the kids mixed them?! Haha! This was toward the end when we got lazy and we're making circle pancakes. One had a whole egg in it! Haha! 

After dinner Joe and the kids left for Aunt Anna's house! The kids had so much fun playing with Christian and Emmerson.

I stayed with Nikki and we took some pics and had a movie night. We watched Courageous. If you haven't seen i, you should. It made me want to be a better mother. 

I don't have any of the pics we took except this one so far. These boys love their Chili Dog!

The next day we decided to go to the Science Center. It was a blast! I was so sick and so achy, but it was worth watching the kids have so much fun! There was a water area that the kids loved the most. 

Then we went into this plane and helicopter area where they could make paper airplanes and launch them. Grant went over to a button and kept turning it on. There was this little boy, maybe 4 or so, that didn't want Grant to touch anything for some reason.  He kept pounding His fist on top of Grant's hand and trying to push him away. I watched them but didn't say anything because I wanted to let them work on it before I jumped in. The boy kept getting more and more aggressive with him so finally I called Grant's name and made him leave the area. Grant went over to the helicopter area where no one else was near and was playing with the buttons over there. This boy came out of nowhere and started doing the same thing again. Pounding his fists on Grant's hands and pushing his arms away. Grant kept trying to play and the boy wouldn't leave him alone. Finally the boy took Grant by the arm with both hands and threw him  to the ground and jumped on top of him. Grant got up and help out his arm when the boy came after him again so the boy started hitting and pushing him. All the while his dumb mom had her face planted in her phone. Finally I grabbed Grant and said as loudly as I could, Grant lets get away from this little boy because he's being mean and hurting you while his Mom won't get her face out of her phone long enough to know what is even going on. I was MAD! We walked out and my heart was racing. I wanted to go back in there, grab the woman's phone and throw it on the ground and tell her to pay attention to her little brat. No excuses. This woman was totally oblivious. I don't even think she knew I was talking about her and her kid if she even heard a thing I was saying for her mind being so far gone into that phone. After that we went to this place where they had a stomach. You coupled walk in and hear the sounds a stomach makes. Of course the kids loved it because it was a slide at the other end and when the kids exited, it would make a farting or burping sound. They thought that was the funniest thing! There was this thing you could walk on that taught you about balance! Rayann was the only baby her age that could walk on it without someone holding her hands. And she wanted to walk back and forth! She did not want to get off of it. Even when the bigger kids were trampling her, she still stayed up and walked along! 

There was a place where they learned about gravity and different metals found in the earth and weight. They liked that. There was the whether area where they had this simulater that you could stand in and feel the different things in nature. Hurricanes, tornados, rain, lightning, earthquake, volcano... That was pretty fun. And then we went to the electronic one. The kids could watch them self on a screen on the wall. They could make shadows on another screen and there was a machine that would project their picture with different lens distortions. It made them look pretty silly. Like the whacky mirrors at a circus. When we finally left, the kids were exhausted. Rayann laid her head in my chest and didn't budge. By the time we got to the van, she wasn't aslee, but she couldn't hold up her head. She bobbled around like a newborn. Within seconds both of them were asleep. We went back to Nikki's house and had lunch and then packed up to leave. I was situated that I could not keep my eyes open the whole way. 

We stopped in Wickiup to change the kid's into their pjs and there was a man there with a horse. He let Grant get up on it and let us take pictures. He was a wild horse that the man just started training a week ago and he was so calm and good with the kids. The man must be a pretty good cowboy! Like my Grandpa was! 

The kids slept the rest of the way home and I was so grateful that they slept all the rest of the night too because that's all I wanted to do!!! It was such a fun weekend and I'm so glad we went. Even though I did get pretty sick! Totally worth it!!! 

My window seat!

So, the thing I said I'd miss the most is the window seat I made. So, naturally, I decided to do a little photo shoot with it! 😃 it was fun and silly and here are the super cute images I got!!! 

Yes! I made Joe do it too!!! Haha! Poor guy! He puts up with me and plays along and for that I am grateful! Like I've always said, he's the only one who would do this stuff for me!!!

Making a house a home.

I sit here one last time, looking over the house I have called home for 8 1/2 years. I have cursed this place and swore my undying hatred for it several times. So why am I unable to sleep, with tears streaming down my face as I begin the next chapter of my life? Because I have made this house my home. This house is where Joe and I faced our biggest pains and most immense joy. This is where Joe sat on the edge of the tub, stroking my hair as I sobbed uncontrollably, morning the loss of another baby and the loss of a dream. It is where I spent my first, most amazing night with my first son. It is where I sat up all night crying with my daughter for months. It is where I became a mother. It is where Joe would come home from work to cabinets off the walsl because I just decided I wanted them to face another way. It is where Joe came home to my awesome electrical work just because it was time for an updated thermostat. It is where Joe came home to this beautiful window seat that I drew up and made all in one day. (The thing I will miss the most about this place). It is where Joe came home to the baby's crib put together because it was FINALLY time! (he was only 9 months old!) it is where Joe can't home to some of the best April fools pranks ever! (Poor Joe!) It is where Joe would come home and the phrase, "what did you do????" Was a norm. It is where we decided to saw, by hand, all the grout around our tile, leaving the tile untouched, and replace the grout ourselves (only took a couple years!). We painted, refaced, rebuilt from scratch. We did most of the work on our own. Joe became an electrician, a plumber, a painter, a fixer of all things. It is where I saw the most beautiful sight I will ever see. My husband holding our children and being THE BEST dad I have ever seen. You never know how much you truly love a man until you see him as your children's daddy. This house was just a house. It wasn't the best house. It wasn't the most beautiful house, it wasn't anything special. But we made this house our home. This house now holds some amazing memories of the best times of my life. My kids running around from room to room. Chasing each other all around. Rayann following me everywhere I go like a little puppy (we call her "Fluffy"!) Joe's constant "oasey" (hoursie) rides. Grant's gymnastics. Grant's extreme excitement when he sees the lock turn and Daddy is home from work! My crafting. Joe's running. This home is beautiful to me and I am sad to see it go. But I am so happy to be moving on and giving my children a better home. One with a backyard and room to run. Where we can make new, just as amazing memories. A house we can make our home. I cannot wait! So here's to the best, craziest 8 1/2 years of my life. If the next 8 years are half as good, I will be a truly blessed woman! No more tears! LET'S DO THIS THING!!!   

How Rayann got her name

Several people have asked me how we picked Rayann's name. It's a little weird, but here it is... When we had Anayah I would always call her "Sweet Baby", but one time it slipped out, "Sweet Baby Ray". So that quickly became my little nickname for her. (Along with everything else under the sun, like squishy and Nia Girl...). Ray made me happy to say because I would think of the song from The Sound of Music where it says "Ray, a drop of golden sun" Anayah was always such a happy little thing so it fit! When we lost her Joe and I talked about naming our next girl "Ray"-something after Anayah, and so it would make sense when I called her Sweet Baby Ray. Before Grant was born, the docs told us he was a girl, so we picked the name Raygan because we both loved the name. But then he was a boy and my first boy was always going to be Grant. So when faced with this new baby we had to make a quick name decision. In the 20 minute car ride to the hospital was when we decided it. We couldn't do Raygan because we didn't want both the kids named after presidents or people might think that's where they got their names. And the meaning behind their names is SO much more. So we had played around with the name Rayann before and I asked Joe how he felt about it and he said he liked it and so that's when we decided. With no time to really talk about it or present one another with other name options, it was hard to really wrap my head around her name and I still have a hard time remembering it. I have to really think before I say her name and she has been called Anayah on a few too many occasions! So there you have it... How Rayann got her name.

And then there were 4! SURPRISE!

This is the story of how Rayann and her birthmom entered our lives! Our lives have been changed so drastically in just a matter of one phone call! 

Halloween night at 5pm we were at Smiths buying candy for the Trunk Or Treat when my special "JeanMarie ringtone" started going off. As I picked up the phone I thought, there's a birthmom because why else would she call on a holiday right before the festivities start. But I still couldn't figure out why she would be working at that time. I answer and she says the usual how are you and then asked what we were doing. We told her we were getting ready to take Grant trick or treating and she said, "Well, would you be willing to forgo your Trunk or Treat to come to the hospital and meet your new baby girl?!" I immediately started crying and my voice became so high pitch only dogs could hear! I said, yes and then my brain started whirling. Who what when where how????? Baby was born the night before and she just met birthmom and she picked us! Birthmom wants to meet us to introduce our baby to us. We calmly put the things from our cart down and walked out of the store. The drive to the hospital was weird. I don't remember it almost at all but it felt like we'd never get there. When we got there it felt like it had only been a minute. It was really weird. Because she was on the labor and delivery floor and they don't allow kids, we had to wait for our friend Cindy to get there and watch Grant before we could go meet her. While we waited JeanMarie told us how it all went down. The hospital called her about the situation and JeanMarie brought down every profile they had. Bm went through a few and got to ours and wouldn't put it down. She said she refused to look at anything  else. Later BM said it was just a feeling that she knew we were her parents. This happened at around 2:30. (We had no idea anything was happening at that point in our lives). Around 2 pm we were driving home from a friend's Halloween party when out of the blue I got this feeling so I said to Joe, I think I'm REALLY ready for a baby now. Like REALLY. Not just ready. And weird, feeling like I wanted a girl. I have always wanted boys. We talked about it and about Anayah and about how we need to get our profile going with Catholic Charities so that we can get on as soon as we can after our agency closes down in December. And thoughts of how our lives would change if we had a baby filled my mind. I thought about it off and on all day. It has truely been a miracle day. When we met BM she was  so positive about everything. She is a strong amazing woman. We talked for a while. I just wanted to get to know all I could about her. I wanted to be able to build a relationship with her so we can keep things open in the future. A while later they brought in Rayann. My head is reeling at this point. This is our new daughter. We knew nothing of her until half an hour ago. And was she gorgeous! She was perfect! And in perfect Joe and Chantelle family fashion, she has squishy cheeks!!! That's the part I love the most! All of our kids are united in their cheekiness! Haha! 

This is our first time meeting her and touching her. It has been a whirl wind adventure and it has been so worth it! She is the perfect addition to our family! I can't wait to bring her home and be able to introduce her to Grant and everyone else. 

15 Months

Parenting class

Joe and I just had our first week of a 7 week parenting program. We just went over the introduction and first chapter and I feel like it has already been a huge help to us! Grant is a very good kid and makes parenting pretty easy, but I could tell that I was tense. I wanted to change that and learn skills that could help us channel his good behavior and make certain that his normal 1 year old behaviors don't eventually get away from us and get out of hand. 

I knew that I was tense and finally got up the nerve about a week ago to sit my parents down separately and ask them what they saw in my parenting and what I could do differently. Both said that I needed to relax. I talked to them about why I get tense when we're out of the house. I feel like with parents now, we are being watched and judged by the older generations of parents. They feel like every new parent is letting their children run them and in a lot of cases that is true. But when your child acts up in public it always seems like it's the old ppl who are watching and rolling eyes at you. No matter what you do. Even if your child is so well behaved saying please and thank you and giving kisses and laughing for over an hour at the oil change place (that they said would take 20 minutes) and the one time he crys out because his leg got stuck in the stroller which he sat without a peep for an hour in, you get stares and eye rolls like he's the worst kid and you're the worst mom ever. It's hard to go places and be judged all the time so what I was doing was over reacting. "Grant don't touch that" "don't do that" "stop" "no" "please Grant cooperate" it gets tiring following your kid around telling him things like that all the time. And I found that since he didn't know what to touch he would just finally start running a muck and touching everything and look back at me and smile. My parents told me that when he's at their house, as long as he's not hurting anything, they don't mind if he touches things which has helped me relax. I gave them permission to help me out too. If they see him doing something, they have every right to get him out of the situation. Since then I have calmed down a lot. Then at the class, in talking about Grant and my goals for the class one couple said, " you just need to relax" I thought that was crazy that someone who doesn't know me and had never known the concersations I've had with my parents lately, was able to pick that up too. So this week I have relaxed! And it is so much easier. I am less stressed and Grant is less crazy! 

In the class, the teacher taught us about what she calls "paving". It is where, when you're going somewhere (say the grocery store) on the way you tell the kids, this is what I expect from you and then if you want, put a reward in place and then they know what you expect and can handle it better. Then bring up how good they were when you're done and even while you're paving the next outing! I have done this with other's kids but should start with Grant. Even if he can't understand now doesn't mean he won't be able to later and this will be something that is just done at that point. I am excited about the things I have learned and cannot wait to learn and implement more things these coming weeks. I am grateful that they are offering this class and that we made the decision to learn more and be better parents. I wish that everyone could take this class. I think that it will be life changing in how I feel as a parent! 

Bike ride photo day!

Yesterday, my dad and us went on a bike ride so that we could take a few family photos for our adoption profile... That's right! We're starting this journey again! We are excited and nervous about the process, but in the end, we know, from experience, that we'll be given the baby that was meant for our family! Anyway, so we went on a bike ride to the park and took some awesome pictures! Looking back, we probably shouldn't have ridden there because all our faces were bright red when we got there, but it did give Grant some time to nap a little. He cooperated pretty well, til the end! Here are some of our pictures!

 

LOVE the Wet N Wild tans lines!

 

Totally done! So funny!

Chantelle's Birthday Weekend

Since my birthday falls on or near Labor Day weekend, I get to celebrate for a long time! This weekend was legend...wait for it... dary! Saturday we went to Wet N Wild with the family from 10:30-7:30. The longest we've ever stayed. It was tiring, but a blast having everyone there. My brother and his girly chick, which we love so, my other brother and his wifey chick, and my youngest brother and parents. The next day was my actual birthday and we went to church. Joe made me a card and traced the boy's hand on it, which I love more than anything! He gave me the movie, Divergant, which I can't watch yet because I'm still working on the book. My parents made me my favorite dinner and Apple Crisp with the promise of Pecan Ice Cream to come! MMM! and my dad got me a photo studio because I have been taking a lot of pictures and started an online photography course! I have used the studio once and need to perfect my photo skills now! After dinner, we took Grant for a bike ride down to the park where I, of course, took pictures! Then Monday... guess what... We went to Wet N Wild... AGAIN! We went with our friends and Grant's girlfriend! We didn't stay that long Monday because we had a BBQ afterward at our friend's house! Tons of yummy food! Overall, I think it's safe to say that this was one of the best birthday's I've had!

 

 

Grandpa, Daddy and Grant after 9 hours of exhausting fun

 

Me and my birthday balloon hat I made for a kid at church who ended up not being there that day!

 

 

At the park after church. Daddy helping Grant down the slide

 

After the park, Grant was going crazy giving everyone kisses! So cute!

 

Labor Day at Wet N Wild with our friends!

 

After the BBQ, Grant went exploring Brin's house! Oh, the trouble they'll get into one day!

Bike ride!

For Christmas last year, Joe got me a bike trailer… for my birthday, we finally put it together! I gave Grant his first ride Sunday after we put it up, but his real first ride was today! He loved it! He sat in the trailer going “Vroom, Vroom!” Then later that afternoon when he saw the trailer again, he pointed to it and said “Vroom Vroom!” I had my dad ride him around so that I could get some pictures of him in the trailer. My parents watched him tonight so that Joe and I could have a nice birthday dinner, just the two of us! It was nice to get to spend time together and just talk! I am grateful for my parents who are so willing to be with Grant, even on a school night!

 

Grandpa giving me a ride around the house before our bike ride.